What would happen if I adopted all of the Social Media and digital marketing BS I usually warn you about? Wonder no more. Welcome to Day 7 of the #StepfordTBB experiment.

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This month, The Gap unveiled its new logo and I have something to say about it.

5 reasons why the new GAP logo rocks:

1. It’s new. New is always good. Look it up.

2. It’s all people are talking about. Have you seen mentions of the thing on the twitternets and the facebooks? Everybody is talking about it! Talk about an explosion in impressions!!! I swear, if the Gap had a Social Media program, they could take credit for some pretty solid proof of engagement right now.

3. It is the most copied and adopted logo in the history of October 2010. (So much so that no one noticed that Belk also changed its logo this month.) Everyone is changing their Twitter avatars to emulate the new GAP logo. Have you ever seen this happen? Here are a few examples. There are hundreds more.

Speaking of Belk: Anybody using the Belk logo for their Twitternet avatar? No.  Which is weird, because it also uses some of the same principles: Gradients of blue against a white background, with black(ish) letters. Evidently, the agency in charge of Belk’s logo redesign didn’t get the memo: Using a pretty font, a catchy tag line (or. triple. tagline. rather.), and turning a box into a half lotus of fairy wing-like awesome wasn’t necessary. A square and a default font would have done the job.

4. People are talking about the GAP now. A month ago, no one even remembered that store existed. Sure, we all remember it from the 1990’s, but when was the last time you went to the mall?

And if you still buy jeans from the Gap, don’t check out H&M. Ever. Or Express, even. Also, from what I hear, Levi’s is for old people.  Keep doing what you’re doing. All is well.

5. It is the only logo that looks like it could have been created in forty-five seconds in Microsoft Word. That’s impressive, no matter how you look at it.

A year ago, I would have written a 72,000 word dissertation on why this logo change sucks, about how it wouldn’t have made it past the first draft review, how it is actually so beyond bad as to be embarrassing, but we’re smack in the middle of the #StepfordTBB experiment so you’re in luck, Gap! This week, I think your new logo is jelly beans and rainbow hearts x infinity.

What have we learned from this? Simple:

1. Change your corporate logo every time you score a new CMO. It will give him something to do, and changing those signs and displays in every store in the country (and the world) is money well spent anyway. Think of all the stupid jobs you could have created or saved with that kind of funding. All the charities you might have endorsed. Good thing you put that cash to better use.

2. When flower-bursts are too hard, go with something corporate and squary-looking. Nothing says “I just bought my seventeenth navy-colored cotton blend sweater from the Gap” like what looks like a default logo in a Mac Paint tutorial.

3. The more average-looking, the better. You don’t want that thing to stand out. Don’t ever stand out. BMW, Apple, Starbucks, the “old” Gap… All way too flashy. Boring is good.

4. When it comes to logo design, either go with dragons and unicorns, or something you can whip up by moving a few boxes around in Powerpoint on your way to your pitch. Graphic designers are so overrated. DIY logos is the way to go! Kudos for being pioneers in that area.

5. Oh, and don’t forget to use a 45% fade effect on your blue square, but without any shadowing or semblance of depth. It always looks awesome just like that. Flat is the new deep.

 

 

left: old. right: new.

 

I know you like me better this way.

#StepfordTBB

Update: The Gap has decided to scrap their new logo. Darn. Man, that was fast!